I am not sure when I settled, but I did. Why am I content to shortchange myself? Anything can happen. I need to remind myself of that simple truth daily.
It is time I figured out exactly what I want. The thing is that what I truly want are things out of my control. How do I balance that with working towards other goals over which I do have some control? This is the type of question that keeps me awake at night. I am no longer content to sit on the sidelines and let things happen. I would love to know precisely when I stopped trying. As much as I hate to admit this to myself, I never stopped caring. I did stop trying.
The sad thing is that I’ve always wanted to do it all: wife, mother, teacher, business owner, and writer. I am not even a wife or mother yet, and still the other three on my list give me fits. My sister Erica thinks I am nuts for wanting to teach and help take over our parents’ seasonal business. She points out that things are much different in education and our business when compared to the days when our mom balanced both. I agree. Still, Erica underestimates me. I can and will have it all – just not all at once.
Frankly, it kills me when people give up on their dreams. Why should I give up on mine? I do not care if my plans are hard. The best things in life are hard. Nothing worthwhile is ever easy. I wish more people realized how much potential lies within everyone. We would all either be much happier – or lost in sorrow when we realize what we could have had if only we hadn’t given up.
If you are betting against me, be prepared to lose. I am far from done.